Hyttetur
The view
Lunch on Saturday
Cabin
Swimming Time
Games
King's Toss
Dinner Prep
Fireside Dinner
Fireside
Characteristics of Christ FHE
The Shurtliff Challenge
Gift from the YSAs
Our Swan
Kære familie, 30 April 2018
I am grateful we could finish up our mission with some big activities and that we will work to the end. I wouldn’t want to coast through the remaining days, twiddling our thumbs. This week has been full of planning for the hyttetur activity, attending our last stake YSA council meeting, playing (and working) together with our YSA for 2 days, and preparing for the YSA fireside. I have also been working on The Bannerand trying to gather pictures for the missionary slide show that Sister Johnson wants to do for the O’Bryants. I really thought I would not be involved in this last project because it will happen at the final Zone Conference in June. We will be long gone by then. But Sister Johnson has big plans and it is something that she cannot (or won’t learn how to) do. So, she has involved me. It is my least priority, but it will get done.
I left the apartment yesterday just after 11:00 a.m. and didn’t return until 12 hours later—it was a long day. I wasn’t sure we would have choir practice before church, but I wanted to be there if we did. We didn’t have it, but I used the time to practice an arrangement of “I Know That My Redeemer Lives” to accompany Gismo Borup for the fireside’s musical number. She had sent me the music Wednesday night, but I didn’t have time to look at it until Saturday, after the hyttetur activity. I practiced at the YSA Center for an hour or more when I dropped off all the supplies we had borrowed from the Center. I also practiced before church and then after church with Gismo.
The girls (Gismo and company) had planned a very nice dinner for us and all the YSA. We had about 30 attend the dinner/fireside last night. It was wonderful to have so many come to support us. There is only one oven at the church, and although it is a big oven, it just couldn’t accommodate all the baking that needed to be done, and dinner was an hour late. The food was good, though—frikadeller, cream potatoes, and salad. One of the girls also made a small lasagna for Dad who, when asked what his favorite Danish meal was, said lasagna. The girls didn’t want me to help in the kitchen, but in the end, they welcomed my help as they tried to get everything ready.
The theme of our hyttetur activity as well as the theme for FHE this month was Christ. Usually the fireside topic also follows the theme. But we were told that we could follow the theme or talk about our mission, or whatever we wanted to say in the fireside. We opted to talk about planning life. I went first and talked about the big plan—the Plan of Salvation—and then our individual plan to get where we want to go. Many times, God’s plan for us may be different that the one we plan. The big goals are all the same as we strive to be obedient, keep the commandments, make covenants and live righteously, but the way to get there may be different. We have to be willing to embrace new plans that come our way and recognize that God’s plan will always be better for us, even though it may involve trials and difficulties that no one would ever choose to be part of his/her plan. I gave the example of Joseph of old. He never planned to be sold into Egypt, to be put into prison, but he could not envision what the Lord had planned for him. Only later did he tell his brothers, ‘Now therefore be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves, that ye sold me hither: for God did send me before you to preserve life…. And God sent me before you to preserve you a posterity in the earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance… So now it was not you that sent me hither, but God…” He recognized that God’s plan was better than his own, and he embraced the plan. Another example I used is of a woman buying an airplane ticket to Italy, only to find herself landing in Holland. She was so disappointed; this was so unfair. She had booked a ticket to Italy and wanted to see all the things in Italy. The plans had changed, and if she spent all her time bemoaning what didn’t happen according to plan, she would miss all the beautiful things she could experience in Holland. If we don’t welcome Heavenly Father’s plan for us, we, too, will miss all the experiences and opportunities we will have that will help us grow into the person we need to be.
I closed my part of the fireside with five things I learned on my mission:
1. Always answer the call. This may mean the call to go on a mission, or a calling in the ward or stake. Perhaps this is part of embracing God’s plan for us, and I have found that in every way I have been blessed by accepting the call.
2. The heart expands. I have learned this through the years as each of my children came into our home, and as each grandchild comes into our family. There is always room to love one more. In this case, my heart has expanded to love each of our YSA. There souls are precious to me and pray for them as I do my own family. This was the kind of mission that exercised my heart and made it bigger.
3. The Gift of Tongues is notmy gift. As hard as I tried, I never mastered this language, but it was not because I didn’t want to. However, I learned that I have other gifts and the gift of discernment is one of them. I rejoice in the gifts of others. It takes us all working together to create a unified whole.
4. The temple is a blessing. I truly feel that we have been blessed to attend the temple so often during our mission. I realize that many mission couples may live a long way from the temple and attend seldomly. We have also been blessed to serve in the temple. I love the people with whom I serve and the many patrons I have come to know through my service. It has been a great blessing to know this temple presidency who have treated us so warmly. They as well as so many of the Danish people we have met are truly the elect of the church. I have learned so much from their example and kindness. But most of all, I have just enjoyed being in the temple—to feel the peace, to receive revelation, to escape the stress. For us, our temple service always came at the end of the week—after all our YSA responsibilities were over. It was perfect.
5. Christ is our mentor, our advocate, our friend. I don’t think one can ever serve a mission without improving his/her relationship with Christ. I see that in the testimonies our young missionaries give when they get ready to go home. It is concentrated, covenant service for 18 months, 2 years, or whatever. And the reason we do it is because we love the Lord. We want to develop the characteristics He showed in the way He taught others, in the way He cared for others, in the righteous way He lived His Life.
After the closing prayer at the fireside, we were put on the ‘hot seat’ and each YSA shared something they appreciated about us. I am not so comfortable in these situations, but it ended up being a very special experience. I never do anything to be noticed, but sometimes it is nice when someone does notice. The sentiment most often express was the unconditional love they felt from us—how we knew them by name and greeted them as they came to the Center—and just that we were always there. Many of the YSA expressed how much they appreciated Dad’s smile—always cheerful and smiling. Many had also received priesthood blessings from him and expressed their appreciation. There were plenty of tears to go around.
Our hyttetur was a great success. Although there were many activities planned, some of them never happened and the YSA just made their own fun. Dad and I had planned 12-15 games for the first night after our institute lesson, but we didn’t do them. Everyone arrived late, dinner was late, so that meant that institute was late. By the time it was over, everyone just wanted to chill and out came various card games as the YSA’s broke up into smaller groups. Everyone had fun, so there was no reason to ‘rock the boat.’ We finally crashed about 1:00 a.m., but the party went on. Although it rained on Thursday, most of the way to the cabin, the rest of the weekend turned out great. Friday was beautiful—sunny, but still cool; I was comfortable in a sweatshirt during the day. After our devotional in the morning, the YSA played some games outside—King’s Play, (similar to Boules but with sticks instead of balls), and a frozen tag that looked more like bombardment and got pretty rough. A few of the YSA went wading/swimming in the sea, but the water was very cold. Some even went in during the middle of the night--crazy. President Petersen, our new member in the stake presidency, was our devotional speaker on Friday. He talked about the scripture in Revelation 3:15-16 about being ‘lukewarm.’ He asked the YSA what they thought the Lord meant by this scripture. It was a time for reflection and made me think of the general conference talk on ‘being all in,’ and the phrase ‘cafeteria Mormons.’
Our responsibility during this activity was just to ‘be there’ and it seems that is what they appreciate most about a senior couple. I made 3 batches of chocolate chip cookie dough, using up the last of my Nestle chocolate chips, and brought that with me. The last night after they had already roasted marshmallow and made s’mores (with a poor substitute for graham crackers), I baked over 100 cookies and finished well after midnight. I couldn’t get them baked fast enough as they just seemed to disappear. They love my cookies—only because I ‘under-bake’ them. I am glad we stayed long enough to be part of this activity again.
Good luck to Lindsey and Derrick with their drive to Houston and the move We are also very proud of Derrick’s accomplishments as he finished his degree. It was a sacrifice for the whole family but will pay off in great dividends for the future. We love you so much and are looking forward to seeing you in a very short time.
Med kærlighed,
Mom
Kære Familie Monday, April 30, 2018
I think I will start with the ending of the week, as that was the most special and emotionally draining for us. Yesterday, we had our final monthly fireside with the YSA. They wanted to honor us but asked us to be the speakers. I guess that is a way of honoring us! Things were in a quiet panic mode in the kitchen when I got there at 5:30. 5 girls were helping prepare a very nice Danish last meal for us. Mom was there trying to help pull it together. She has gotten excellent in cooking meals for 25 – 40 and having everything ready on time and hot. The girls were way behind cooking the food and we did not eat until 7:00 instead of 6:00. They set up tables in the foyer (more quaint that the gym) with cloth table cloths and lights down the middle. The dinner was excellent and they used real plates, glasses and utensils (which meant a lot of dishwashing). The fireside got started about 7:50. Karlee Marquardt conducted and Gismo Borup sang a solo, I Know that My Redeemer Lives, with mom on the Piano. Thomas Ringheim was there to preside. Sister Stokholm also came to support as the stake RS president. I think the fireside went well. It was supposed to be in honor of us but with a theme of Finding Peace in Christ. We did not stick to that theme very well but instead focused on God's plan for us and what happens when His plan is not the same as the plan we have for ourselves. We had planned that mom would open with 10 min, I would follow with 20-25, and she would close with 10 min. That all worked out well and we concluded in a little less than an hour total. We had not talked in detail about what we were each going to say and were worried that we might overlap, etc. That did not happen, and I think we meshed it together quite nicely. My impression was that we hit a chord with at least some of the YSA. I ended with my thoughts on the pathway to a Happy Life that I would give to my children as a last testament.
We thought that would be it for the fireside, except for refreshments. Emma Østergaard had made 2 different fruit tarts. They had a surprise planned for us however. We were put in the "warm seats" and each of the YSA took turns saying a few words about us and expressing gratitude for our service. It was a very emotional time and took almost another hour. There were around 30 YSA there at this time (a few more were there for dinner who had to leave). The turnout was amazing and they were so gracious with the compliments and expressions of love. It really meant a lot and is a great ending to our mission and service to them. I don't think we will ever be the same as they have made an enormous impression on us. I guess our impact and service to them has made a difference as well. We all love each other and are grateful for these years we have been together. It is hard to part. A number promised to come see us in Texas and we will certainly try to come back at some time; though in my heart I feel like that will be anticlimactic. They will have moved on. Many will be married or off to another country. We will have been replaced by another couple who will have filled our shoes and also earned their love and respect. Such is life. It will be impossible to recreate the feelings expressed last night and the ache in our hearts. Afterwards almost all of them came up to give us hugs. It was a pleasure to call them by name, hug them back and whisper something in their ear about what their friendship and association has meant to me. Most of them I have deep feelings of love for. A few I know more superficially and so only had regrets that I hadn't had more time get to know them. It is harder when you don't see them very often. They also had a gift for us. It is a framed map of Denmark with lights for the major cities. Each of the YSA signed their name on it. It will be a treasured legacy for us. I mentioned priesthood blessing in my remarks and what a privilege it was to use my priesthood that way. Afterwards, Helena Frederiksen and Gismo Borup each asked me for a blessing. That was another special privilege. We got home around 11:00. Brother Ringheim and Sister Stokholm did much of the cleanup while we did the warm seat. That was so kind of them. We were emotionally drained and too tired to go to bed straight away.
We also had our Hyttetur retreat Thurs – Saturday. That has been in the planning works for quite a while so it was a major event to enjoy. This time the scout cabin we rented was 90 minutes to the South on the island of Lolland. It is on the beach, which was smelly and muddy but very pretty. The cabin is in a batch of woods surrounded by plowed fields, so it is sort of like an island of trees bordering the sea coast. We had 38 YSA come. 5 are from the Aarhus stake. 7 showed up without pre-registering; so, like these YSA who don’t want to commit to anything until the last minute, so they see who is going and if something better is available. Dinner was cold pizza (nothing else). We had an Institute lesson for an hour on Finding Peace in Christ taught in English by Jens Anderson (with us, there were 5 English speakers). He is always an inspiring teacher. Two things he did was ask for thoughts on what peace meant to them based on the world we live in. He got some good perspectives with maybe 5 different themes of what peace can mean. Then he divided them into 5 different groups and passed out copies of The Living Christ. Each group had to find examples of how Christ can help us find peace from the testimonies of the apostles. Our role in this event was pretty low key. Assignments were made for meals and cleanup. Jonathan Leit had planned the menus and done all the food shopping. We made a bunch of popcorn around midnight on Thursday which they ate with the games they were playing. We went to bed around 1:15 despite lots of noise which continued until at least 2:00. Some of the youth were up until 4:00. Friday night we got to bed a little earlier, 12:45. We heard in the morning that a few of them went swimming around 3:00 am. The water was very cold, so I am sure it was more of a dare-devil thing, though 6-7 went swimming on Thursday as well.
Saturday, the YSA started leaving at 6:00 am. That woke us up a few times in the morning. By the time lunch and clean up started we were down to about 20 people, about half. It seemed those that stayed slept in after an even shorter night. Lunch was planned for the day, but Jonathan did not buy any food for it thinking that we would just eat up the leftovers. There were very few of those, so mom decided she better get to the store and get some sandwich fixings and some fruit. She thought we would have 30 for lunch so she way over bought and there was food to take home. It didn't look like the "warm chair" activity was going to work out, but Gismo came through and organized it. She has the forceful leadership to just make things happen. We divided into 3 groups of 6 or 8 and did a round robin, tell something nice about each person. It really is a good way to share and get a little closer to each other. One person writes down the comments, so we can take them with us. While that was taking place, Gismo and Sissel cleaned the dining area and got lunch ready. The day was really nice with the sun shining so all these activities were done outdoors on picnic tables.
Then it was cleanup time. Those that were left pretty much helped and we were done and on our way by 1:30. I think the Hyttetur was another big success. The YSA really like this atmosphere of getting away into a bit of nature and being by themselves. A few group games, an activity or two like a competition of taking selfie-pictures of scenes in the surrounding area by different groups in a car, bonfires, food with games and they are happy.
We only had 11 come out to FHE on Monday, about half of last week. I can never figure out why the attendance fluctuates so much. The activity was cutting pictures out of church magazines to make a page on the Characteristics of Christ, e.g. Courage, Patience, Love, Charity, etc. They worked in teams of two and came up with some small posters to illustrate their chosen trait. The person assigned the refreshments did not come, so mom ran to Netto to buy ingredients and she made waffles with my help. They are always a big hit and they went through 3 recipes with fruit and other toppings. They love Nutella and can go through a large bottle in one night. It looked like they might go home early but after 9:00, even though there were only about 6 left, they turned on some music and started dancing. They left at 10:00.
Love, Dad.
P.S. I will end by attaching an outline of the last part of my fireside talk. I was thinking about our family as I decided on these 9 important points.
Fathers in the BofM often gathered their posterity together for last advice and blessings. I am going away, hopefully not in the same sense of these fathers who had reached the end of their lives. But this is some advice I would give my children. It applies to your life now and after you are married with children. To me, it is part of the Pathway to Happiness.
1. Embrace the plan – live the gospel, be committed & dependable
2. YM, Honor your Priesthood – example of SLC blessings in March
3. Develop charity – pure love of Christ, learn to minister & love. As a member of the church, you will spend a lifetime of service; Make a difference in others’ lives.
4. Serve with all your heart, might, mind and strength. Accept and magnify every calling. You will find that one leads to and prepares you for another. Lord will qualify you and give you rich experiences.
5. Practice humility and prayer – Don’t get stuck on yourself. Any success is due to the Lord’s blessings.
6. Lead in your family – form a true partnership with your spouse and with God. With a threesome you cannot fail. Especially important for the YM as society is becoming more female dominant. Resist social trends and lead in your home.
7. Love your spouse – Apply to your relationships now. Allow her to grow, support her in her callings. (Sister Hinckley: Gordon always giving her wings to fly.)
8. Be a parent – teach values, character & service by example. FHE, family prayer, family meal times. Work together, play together. Make love for each other and the Lord the central theme of your home.
9. Practice selflessness – perhaps one of the hardest traits to practice consistently. Key to a successful marriage. Learn it now before you are married.
D&C 90:24
Search diligently, pray always, and be believing, and all things shall work together for your good, if ye walk uprightly and remember the covenant wherewith ye have covenanted one with another.
If your life plan is changed without your permission, embrace it, because the Lord will take everything in your life and turn it for your good, if you will let Him.
President Uchtdorf, “There are times when we have to step out into the darkness in faith, confident that God will place ground beneath our feet once we do.”
President Gordon B. Hinckley, "If you do your best, it will all work out. Put your trust in God .... The Lord will not forsake us."
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