Celebrated our anniversary with Mom's lemon meringue pie.
Kære familie, March
18, 2018
It has been 42 years since I went to the temple with Dad to
be married on a cool spring day just one day after my last final at the
university. It is amazing how much of a
life-time has passed since that day. I
was 21 years old that day—the years I have been married are double those I
spent as a child and growing up to adulthood.
I sound very old just writing about it.
And yet I still remember the youthful wonder of all that would now
change in my life. Gone were the days of
living at home, dating, and trying to decide my future. My
future now became our future and
although there were still many decisions we would make over the next 40+ years,
we would make them together. This was
the beginning of our eternal family. We
could not know then that we would be blessed with five wonderful children and
that they would grow up (despite us) and get married and have families of their
own. Your unions have blessed us with
wonderful daughters and sons-in law as well as 18 beautiful grandchildren. It just keeps getting better. And what happens to the love we felt on that
March day in 1976? It has increased as
we have learned together through disagreements, struggles, and trials, but also
through joys, tender moments and wonderful memories. I am grateful I have Dad at my side to share
the experiences of life. He has been my
shoulder to cry on many times and he willingly lets me cry, even when he is helpless
to know what to do. I am a very
complicated person and Dad has put up with that all these years. I’m sure I am not as appreciative of his
patience and love as I should be. We are
still a work in progress—at least I am. It
is almost serendipity that we would go to the exact place a week ago where Dad
proposed to me and see the temple where we were married. We have been very blessed and it all began by
making covenants in the temple.
We had a special experience yesterday when we attended the
baptism for a young man—Mathias Christensen.
We don’t know this young man very well—we have actually only met him one
other time when he came to institute, but we know a little bit about his story
and we know his friend. His friend is
Felix Nørrung who just received his mission call last week to Russia. And as much as we are thrilled for Mathias
and hope he will get involved in YSA and are anxious to befriend him and love
him, we are more thrilled for Felix. We
have watched his journey over the last 18 months we have known him. We met him just before he turned 18. For several months we did not see him at
activities in the YSA center. The only time
we met him is if we went to church in Roskilde.
There is a large group of YSA from Roskilde, and even though many of
them have since moved to Copenhagen for school, they know all the young people
in their ward well and they are a close group.
Eventually Felix and others in his age group began to come to
institute. It was spotty at first, but
by last fall, after Golden Days, we noticed that his young group were now
regulars. They were not only
participating each week but taking on assignments. I think these 18-year-olds are shy about
getting involved with all the ‘old’ YSA’s.
They feel like the ‘babies.’ But
once they get over their shyness and realize that they are accepted, loved and
needed in our YSA group, it is as though they have always been a part of
it. I was actually surprised when I
learned that Felix was preparing for a mission because the transformation
seemed so sudden—but I could see the desire in his eyes and there was a marked
change in his countenance.
Felix went to school with Mathias. They were buddies. As Felix started to prepare for a mission, he
had a chance to talk to his friend about his decision. Mathias seemed interested and wanted to know
more about what Felix believed and that is when Felix invited him to meet with
the missionaries. Felix is taking the
Mission Prep class in institute. He
shared this experience of inviting his friend to meet with the missionaries in
class and there wasn’t a dry eye as Felix bore his testimony about the
wonderful feeling he had when telling his friend about the church. Felix has participated in Mathias’ journey to
baptism. The crowning moment was yesterday
when he baptized him. I can’t think of a
better gift to give a friend. The whole
baptism service was filled with the spirit—from the talks to the music, but it
practically exploded when we went to the baptismal font. There were nearly 50 people crowded into the
small room. Felix and Mathias went into
the water and as Felix raised his hand, he was overcome. He could not contain the tears that flowed
freely, and it took a moment for him to compose himself. By then everyone in the room was in tears as
we witnessed this sweet moment between friends.
After the baptism, the two embraced as brothers in the gospel. Happy moment!
What a blessing for Felix to be a missionary—have his first
baptism—before he ever goes into the mission field. This will be a big boost to him as he leaves
in a few months.
We had thought to do some sight-seeing on the way home from
the baptism, but the cold weather has really put a damper on doing outside
activities. The wind chill makes it feel
like 10˚
F. It is also not a good time to see
some of these out-of-the-way places because, although the grounds are open
year-round, the castles are only open May-September. We may just be out of luck. But we got a better offer anyway, or so we
realized later. Gismo and a group of YSA
were headed to IKEA to do some shopping.
She had her family’s car, so she wanted to make the most of it. She invited us to come along after the
baptism. When we left, they were no
where to be seen so we were just going to head home, but we got a text telling
us to come, so we went. IKEA on Saturday
is a nightmare and is the LAST place
Dad wants to be. But he was a good
sport as we wandered around the crowded store with this group of 5 YSA. We all got a hotdog afterwards and I’m sure
the selfie picture we took as a group will show up on Facebook sometime. Gismo and the others were staying in Roskilde
for the week-end with their families, but one girl lives with her parents in
Copenhagen. She asked if she could get a
ride back to Copenhagen (as opposed to taking a bus/train home). We said sure—as it was on our way. Astrid Toft is a shy girl who had her 20th
birthday today. She has been a bit lost
in the church and is making her way back.
She started to come to institute last fall but hasn’t been super active. She has a beautiful voice and I give the YSA
girls in her ward all the credit for inviting her to sing in some musical
numbers. This means coming to practices
after FHE or institute (so you might as well come to FHE and institute), as
well as coming to firesides where you will be performing the musical
number. I was surprised to see that she
had made the trip from Copenhagen to Roskilde to attend the baptism. Then Gismo dragged her to IKEA—she doesn’t
take ‘no’ for an answer. It is good for
her to associate with the YSA and get involved.
We had a nice visit with her all the way home (30-minute drive) and were
grateful for the one-on-one time with her.
She is in her spring of decision
as she wonders what to do with her life—school, work, mission? We were pleased that mission was in the mix. We
will continue to encourage her to think about and prepare for a mission. Like I told Lindsey many moons ago when I
encouraged her to prepare for a mission, “Whether you go or not, the
preparation will never be wasted.” We
sometimes do our best work when we get to minister one-on-one at the crossroads,
and quite often it comes at unexpected times.
Our My Plan class
has struggled to take flight. Last week
we only had 2 young men come—that has been the average attendance for the
class, but we have persevered and figured the lessons were beneficial
individually. I think the church has
done an excellent job with the self-reliance courses. I am curious to know how Zane’s Personal
Finance course is going. We helped
facilitate that course last summer for the YSA and again felt that it was
beneficial for those who came even if they weren’t consistent—but consistency
is always best. Dad and I have taken
turns teaching and tomorrow is our last course.
We had hoped to do two rounds of this course before we went home and had
identified a group of RM’s to take the next course, but alas, it will have to
be someone else as we don’t have 8 weeks left to do another course (assuming we
would teach every week). We started
these lessons the first week in January and it has taken us 11 weeks because
some weeks no one showed up.
Last week I facilitated some discussion about overcoming
opposition. There were some great
principles for everyone to learn—whether you are a returned missionary just
starting in your life plan, or at my age with much of my life-plan behind
me. When we are aware that Satan is
doing everything to oppose our eternal progression, we can set our frontal
attack against him and find ways to protect ourselves. The following is a quote from the manual:
Satan works constantly
to lead us off course and keep us from accomplishing the Lord’s work and plan.
He desires to deceive, confuse, distract, and dissuade you. He wants you to
justify sin. He does so by appealing to any weakness of the flesh, including
pride and desires for personal gain or ambition. He will confront you and
attempt to make you question your beliefs and your identity as a child of our
Father in Heaven. As you strive to make and keep spiritual commitments in your
life, he will attack you, as he did Moses (see Moses 1:12–22), Jesus Christ
(see Matthew 4:1–11), Joseph Smith (see Joseph Smith—History 1:15), and many
others.
We need to create a plan to protect ourselves spiritually
from opposition to our faith, because those times will come. I liked this
message from Elder Holland about staying on course during challenges and
opposition. He tells us to ‘cast not
away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompense of reward,’ (Hebrews
10:35) and then he tells us that means don’t give up and don’t give
in to that being who is bent on the destruction of your happiness.
I hope you all have a nice week. I am so glad you all got somewhat of a break
during Spring Break. It sounds like
Lindsey had a working Spring Break—but then Utah doesn’t have a Spring Break
until Easter. Maybe you will get some relief
then.
Med kærlighed,
Mom
Kære Familie Sunday, March 18, 2018
While you have enjoyed Spring Break, I suppose with nice warm
weather suitable for camping, we have been shivering through our coldest week
yet. The temperatures were colder before
our trip to Utah, but the wind has been constantly howling this week dropping
the wind chill to where we don’t want to be outside or walk, even though we
have had to. Any exposed skin is
punished by the wind. I have been very
grateful for my warm down coat which I have used a lot this year along with my
scarf and fur lined boots. Last year, I
was thinking that I wasted money on both as I didn’t use them very much. This year I love them and don’t care how I
look – everyone else is bundled up as well.
We still see a few sitting outside drinking in front of a café. I don’t understand them but maybe they come
from Finland or Siberia.
I gave away my
bicycle to one of the temple missionaries this week. I overheard him talking to another temple
worker about finding a bicycle to ride.
So I mentioned that mine would be available when I go home. They are only here for another 4 ½ months on
a 6-month mission and somehow he talked me out of it even though I would really
like to keep it until I go. He is a rider and I don’t use it very often. I rode the bike to the temple apartments and mom
picked me up in the car. I wanted to sell it to him for the $75 that I paid for
it (or something close) but I had sort of offered it to him. He did not bring up payment again, so I let
it pass. He will hopefully pass it on to
another senior missionary who will make use of it when he goes. My contribution to the health and well-being
of senior missionaries.
We had our stake
DVI meeting on Wednesday and a major item of discussion was the ineffectiveness
of Ward YSA Committees, ward YSA couples and YSA reps across the stake. We have
trained every ward and the priesthood leaders on this, so it is frustrating
that it does not have better traction. In most cases, they are not meeting regularly
and accomplishing anything. I think the
link between the committee and reps and the EQ, RS and Ward Council is not
working and that is the underlying cause of the lack of action and success. It
starts with the bishop insisting that the monthly YSA Committee Meeting be held
and holding a counselor responsible for pulling the members together. If the EQ and RS would realize that this
meeting is an outreach of their presidencies and can help in the rescue and
perfecting work, then they would be much more prone to encourage the
meeting. Training is also essential for
the YSA couple and the reps, so they understand their responsibilities. It should be much more than teaching a SS
class and hosting a monthly fireside.
They complain that it is hard to have a consistent fireside on a Sunday
night as there are a lot of conflicts with stake firesides. President Olsen's response was for them to
think out of the box and have lunches after the block or even during the SS
class. The calling is not about firesides. They should also remember their
purpose and focus on the One, face to face if possible. In other words, there is a lot of work to be
done if they would just focus on it.
We also discussed
how to handle the 17-year-olds in the stake.
They are always a bit of a problem and for the first time I understood that
they are starting seminary here at age 13 and thus graduate from seminary at
17. Since they are not really in YSA
until 18, there is a year when they are in limbo land. We asked why they don’t start seminary until
age 14 and they said it was because they thought we started at 13 in the
states????? (There must be a bigger
story behind this that we haven’t heard yet.) In any case subject to that
changing sometime in the future, the stake presidency agreed on the following.
o They should attend FHE 17 with families in
their homes until they turn 18.
o Their social life should continue to be with
the ward youth, both for fellowshipping younger youth and because of the age
difference with the older YSA.
o They should attend Mutual on Wednesdays and
participate in the stake Super Saturdays.
o Their spiritual life can be with Institute in
place of seminary if they have completed 4 years and they can attend both
Institute classes and the monthly firesides.
These rules are
not any different than what we have been following, but it is perhaps clearer
to everyone why they are in place. The
17-year-olds will continue to feel half in and half out of the YSA though,
because in reality they are.
For Institute on
Thursday, Gismo was making dinner with Anders Pang as a date (part of the
Shurtliff Challenge which is continuing this month). She told us not to come before 5:30 as she
did not need help and did not want the ambiance of their date messed up! When
we arrived at 5:30 however, Alma was in the kitchen helping them as she arrived
early and went to work. I guess it still
worked out ok. There were about 20 for
dinner and we got up to 38 for the class.
The dinner was a chicken soup with a broth made of green pepper and
onions. Not a lot of substance to it. There was nothing else to go with it either, neither
bread nor fruit nor salad. We each had a
bowl of soup but it was not very filling.
On the way home at 10:00, we were both hungry and so stopped at Burger
King, which we walk by, even though it was so late. First time we have done that. It was nice to break the cold walk in half
and warm up for a few minutes before continuing towards home and the Whopper
tasted great.
With Grandma’s
passing and the removal of the need to spend time taking care of her, my thoughts
have been a bit more on post mission life.
We have had two senior missionary couples arrive this week. The Browns will live above us for only 45
days in the temple apartment and serve in the temple. They were recruited to meet a short-term need
for temple workers. We need to learn
more about them, but they said this is their 7th mission of one kind
or another. Some of them have been short
and some have been at home, but they have been in Boston, here on a previous 18-month
temple mission, Cove Fort, Florida on a ranch, and in China twice under the BYU
teaching program. The Telfords arrived
just yesterday and will spend 6 months on a temple mission. (The temple is hurting for long-term missionaries,
so they are filling in with recycled missionaries!). The Telfords were here in
our position as the YSA couple about 5 years ago. They are back for a short stay. This is interesting and does make us ask
ourselves when and where we will serve another mission. I asked the Browns if it was hard to leave
their family so often, and they said that their closest child lives 3 hours
away and 3 others are in California, so they don’t see them that often anyway
and she did not want to babysit very much.
I think our situation is different and we love getting with the family
as often as we can and we love to babysit those cute grandkids. So we will see. There is something exciting about looking at
missionary opportunities and seeing if something feels right, but we will see
what home-life feels like and what callings might come our way. We truly want to be directed to where the
Lord needs us most and then we have faith that everything else will turn out
just fine. This quote is in my lesson for tomorrow and it stands out to me as
well. I have myself said that we need to
get back to “real life” so I stand corrected by a prophet.
President Thomas
S. Monson taught: “The Savior taught His disciples, ‘For whosoever will save
his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same
shall save it.’ “I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose
ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those
who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and figuratively lose their
lives, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and
flourish—and in effect save their lives” (“What Have I Done for Someone Today?”
Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2009, 85). After returning home, many returned
missionaries believe that they have to get back into the “real world.” But this
is inaccurate. You are never to become part of this world; you are to rise
above and shine before the world (see Matthew 5:16).
Thanks for the letters that have come already. We love reading them and have empathy for the
hard spots in your lives. That which
does not break us makes us stronger and I know nothing can break you if you
stay close to the Lord.
All my love, Dad.
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